Why we have Children
For those of you who know me well, my wife and I are expecting our first child in January, with G-d's help. I've been delving deeper into my Jewish roots over the last year and have been becoming more and more fascinated by the freely available explanations of life's concepts, questions and answers. Through what I've learned so far, I’d like to share what I currently believe to be the reason why so much emphasis is put on having children in Judaism. There is the clear responsibility of Jews being a light unto the world and being role models that are honest in all their dealings, relationships and overall good human beings, which would clearly conclude that it’s important to “be fruitful and multiply” so as to reach and cause positive effects on as much of humanity as possible. However, there is a deeper meaning that goes closer to the relationship between children and their parents. One of the Ten Commandments is to respect your parents, which most of us know is a very hard commandment to keep at times. Of all the 248 positive commandments and 365 negative commandments that Jews are required to keep, why is this one given such importance? Here’s a better question: we know that the first five commandments are for the relationship of man to G-d, and the next five are for the relationship between man and man. Why is respecting your parents a commandment between man and G-d? In a lot of cases, in both the Torah and therefore in Prayer, you’ll see G-d’s name being written in different ways. Sometimes you will see Elo-kim, which represents G-d’s attribute of “din” (justice) and sometimes you will see Yu-K-Vav-K representing His attribute of “rahamim” (mercy). If G-d were to exercise his attribute of justice at all times with no mercy, the world would be destroyed almost immediately given the atrocities that go on in the world. If He were to solely exercise his attribute of mercy, there would be no reward and punishment, causing total chaos in the world. What good are laws without judgment when they are broken? Let’s parallel these two attributes to your parents. Parents will, in most cases, have to exercise both of these attributes. Usually it’s split between the father and mother. The father will take on the “educator” role and the one to serve out punishment when his children are misbehaving. The mother will be the one you run to when you need something and always be the one you are closest to because you can relate more closely to someone who shows constant love, or at least the way you perceive love at a young age. But the Torah tells you to respect them both, and actually puts the father before the mother in the wording. When we’re young and we don’t understand why we “can’t have” this, “can’t do” this, “can’t go” there, the answer is in most cases “you’ll understand when you’re older”. The truth is, when you finally reach the age where you understand why you were told “no” and denied things you wanted at a young age, you realize that even though it seemed to be a form of punishment or lack of love back then, today with your better developed intellect you understand that it was all done out of love. Your parents tried to direct you based on their own past experiences, and sometimes it takes the attribute of justice to help push you back in the proper direction. This allows us to understand that everything G-d does is for the good. Whether you are suffering in your material existence by lack of funds, trouble at work, trouble with your health or your family’s health, these are all forms of communication between G-d and you to help drive you in a certain direction. And who better to do that than the One with the most experience of anyone you can possibly fathom. If you concentrate on this you will realize that there is no reason to be angry, upset, sad or depressed. You will realize that your life is constantly being helped and directed from above. It is true that we believe in free will and making our own choices, but we are also receiving constant divine assistance and are only given tests and trials in life that we have the potential to overcome. So now that we understand the above, we realize that honoring your parents for both their attributes of justice and mercy is a direct way of honoring G-d by acknowledging that everything He does is for the good and we respect and love Him for it. Unfortunately, it sometimes takes the realization that you will be a father soon to understand and appreciate your parents and give G-d his proper tribute. We should all merit to extend this circle of learning to love and appreciate our parents and G-d by extension and hopefully sooner rather than later. 
